DON’T SELL YOURSELF SHORT: A MARKETER’S INSIGHT TO CREATE A POWERFUL PROFILE (part 4 of 4)

This is the fourth and final part of a four-part blog series on marketing yourself with your adoption profile book. It was written by John Yonkoski who is an adoptive father and marketing professional.

Know your Audience:

It seems a lot of people I speak with about our adoption assume our birth mom is a 16 year old girl whose parents made the decision for her.  That’s not the case at all.  She’s a 30 year old, Mother of four, taking college classes online while the kids sleep.  She probably would have parented if her husband hadn’t filed for divorce.

Like everyone else, I also made some assumptions about the birthparents that would view our adoption profile.  I figured it’s probably going to be a female (possibly a couple).  I knew they would be Caucasian (at the time, we were specifically seeking a Caucasian newborn).  I figured alcohol (people drinking in photos) probably wouldn’t be an issue – but – could be a deal breaker (on the possibility there were abuse issues somewhere in the family).  I assumed she wasn’t drinking or doing drugs while she was pregnant (since we were specifically seeking a baby that hadn’t been exposed to these substances).  I figured they probably don’t have a ton of money.  I assumed they would be less educated than my wife and I, but didn’t assume they would be incapable of comprehending big words.  I assumed they would look at a stack of 10 profiles and pick three they liked (strictly based on the cover) and that if it was too wordy, they might set it down.   I figured they value family and friends.  I figured they value stability – both in terms of our marriage and having a place we call home for the foreseeable future (particularly since we were seeking an open adoption).

So, how did these assumptions affect our adoption profile?  We axed any photos where people were drinking.  We wanted to show that we were financially secure, yet not superficial and egregious (we spoke a lot about how important relationships, rather than money, were to us).  We didn’t want to appear as some condescending authorative figure by “dumbing down” the way we spoke and the words we used.   We used lots of photos.  Had we been open to other races, I would have included more photos of my diverse group of friends (I would consider that critical).  We showcased the time and money we’ve invested in remodeling our home.

You may not agree with the assumptions I made and your assumptions may be different.  As it turns out, mine were spot on with our birth mother.  From our profile, she really connected with us.  It’s no surprise, our profile was written just for her.

If you’re working with an agency, ask questions about the birthparents they work with.  Reflect back on the decisions you made when completing your grids.  Try to get an understanding of who will be reading your profile and tailor it to their needs.  Remember – you’re writing the profile for the birthparents, not for you.  Their opinion matters, not yours.

Get meaningful feedback from others.  If you ask someone, “how do you like it?” they’ll respond with “it looks good”.  Instead, say “tell me three things you would change”.  In my case, my Sister in-law (who’s a graphic designer) opined that it was a little (not a lot) busy.  Her suggestion was to spread it out a little more and have more pages.

From a graphic design perspective, she’s right.  However, although looks are important for a profile – they’re not everything.  Had we taken her advice, we would have had to remove some of our content (otherwise it would be too many pages).  I appreciated her insight, but didn’t make any major changes to our profile.

My point is, don’t take any feedback as Gospel, but do consider the responses.  Revise as appropriate, but don’t submit a profile that hasn’t been meaningfully critiqued.

Provide Bight Size Pieces of Information:

Have you ever gone to a website – and – before you know it, you’ve been there for 20 minutes?  It wasn’t your intent, but it happened.  Why do some sites have this affect?  Because they give you a bit of info – you like it and want more.   So, you click and get more.  The process repeats.  The site literally sucks you in.

Their secret is that they don’t just give you it all on one page.  Because, you would see all the material and think “I don’t have time for this” and leave.  Don’t make the mistake of overwhelming your reader by sharing your life story on the first page (or any page for that matter).

Similarly, give them the good stuff right up front – what you really, really want them to know.   Put the less important stuff towards the end.  For example, the details about our families were the last pages of our profile.  Why?  Because birthparents care less about our families than they do about us.  It was clear we had family, that they live nearby, and that we are close with them.  However, what they do for a living and their personalities is less relevant and requires words.

Describing our families is going to require space – I want the “premium space” upfront devoted to us.  My rationale was that if they made it to the end of the profile, they were interested in us and would be willing to read about them.   Equally likely, they might not even see the need to.

In our agency, birthparents are presented “up to ten profiles” at one sitting and they’re not required to give them all equal time.  They’re not required to review them completely.  Play it safe by assuming they have short attention spans.  Don’t blow the chance for them to get to know you.

The arrangement of the pages (and the content) is so important that I would say that if our profile were read from back to front, it would have been terrible and uninteresting (even though everything else is the same).   I doubt our birthmother would have read much of it and wouldn’t have taken the time to learn about us.

Again, best stuff up front with the profile becoming increasingly wordy as the reader becomes increasingly interested in what you have to say.  Your goal is to suck the reader in.

Don’t be a ”Debbie Downer”

Life isn’t all rosy and perfect for any of us.  But, there are some things you just don’t really share with everyone.   And, when you do share it – you don’t really want to agonize about it and bring others down.   The same goes for your profile – most people know better than to divulge all the details about a marriage that ended with a bitter divorce and ugly custody battle.

In adoption profiles, the most common example I’ve seen is infertility.  It seems many profiles hope to get empathy from the birthparents in hopes of being selected.  It is fine (recommended even) that you share it, but keep it positive.  Talk about what you’ve learned, how you’ve grown, or how it opened your eyes to the beauty of adoption.  Don’t agonize over it.

After all, any infertility issues you may have experienced will make much more sense when you meet your little one.  Trust me.

Need help with your profile?  Contact the author at adoptionprofilehelp@yahoo.com.

Adoption STAR does not guarantee the services of third party providers.

To read part one of of marketing yourself through your adoption profile, please click here.

You can read part two of the blog series by clicking here.

Part three of marketing yourself can be read here.

To receive a downloadable PDF with all four parts, please email John Yonkoski

 

DON’T SELL YOURSELF SHORT: A MARKETER’S INSIGHT TO CREATE A POWERFUL PROFILE (PART 3 of 4)

This is the third part of a four part blog series on marketing yourself with your adoption profile book. It was written by John Yonkoski who is an adoptive father and marketing professional. Part four  will be published Wednesday, February 22 . To read part one of the blog series, please click here. To read part two, please click here.

Don’t Have A Cover Like Every Other: (I credit this one to my wife)

It’s true – people judge a book by its cover.  Your cover of your adoption profile is your first impression – it needs to be appealing on some level.  Otherwise, it’s just one of many…and may go unnoticed.  You may never have the opportunity to showcase how wonderful you are.  That’s unfortunate.

I would argue that most people don’t even have a photo that is cover worthy.  Most people likely need to have one professionally taken.  We seriously considered taking our dogs to a photographer to get a good family shot.  However, my wife had a crazy idea.  We went with it.

The photo on our cover showed us having a blast.  We looked fun – crazy fun really (complete with goofy smiles on our faces).  It was us, riding an antique two -person bicycle at Grandma’s cottage.  I’m probably the only guy that has ever appeared topless on the cover of an adoption profile.  I was pretty sure someone would pick it up, even just to see how whacky we are.  She did.

That photo, although interesting, wasn’t a great photo for the cover in and of itself.  We looked like a couple teenagers goofing around.  For birthparents, that’s probably not so good.  I’m sure maturity and responsibility rank pretty high on their list.

We balanced it out by adding a nice picture of us from our wedding.  We looked happy, responsible and mature.  Together, the pics told a story about us no single photo could.  Similarly, I would argue that most couples also have a serious side and a fun side.  Accordingly, I think two pictures on the cover is probably best – one that’s serious and one that’s fun.

Otherwise, the reader may never see the other side (because they didn’t pick it up).   It’s my first impression – I don’t want to come across as too fun, or, too serious.  I’m both – and I want you to know it!  I think two pictures on the cover is probably the simplest way to be sure your profile will be appealing enough to be viewed.

We also bolstered our cover by including a few of our favorite quotes.  From the quotes, you get an idea of what we value.  From the two photos, you get an idea of what we’re like.  Much like a magazine, the reader had an idea of what was contained within and the cover was visually appealing (colorful, with a nice layout).  It was unique and interesting.

With a cover like ours, we were pretty confident someone would take the time to learn about us.  That’s huge.  A “cover like every other” is a big risk that the profile may go unnoticed and unviewed.

Follow the Basic Rules for Presentations:

Tell them what you’re going to tell them.   Tell them.  Tell them what you told them.  We’ve all heard it before.  A presentation or sales pitch that fails to say “we’re going to show you”, then shows you, and concludes with “we just showed you” is very weak.  It virtually requires the audience to draw their own conclusions, rather than communicating the message you are looking to convey.  Still, very few profiles actually offer a good intro and/or conclusion.

An adoption profile is created to help the birthparents choose a home and family for placement.  Your intention is to invite the reader in to your life.  A short narration of what they’re going to see (in your profile) is highly influential and proper.  In the introduction for our profile, I pulled a stunt I’ve never seen done before – I highly attribute our success to the very first thing the birthparents saw after reading the required “Dear Birthparent” letter.

I consider our intro to be the “secret sauce” for a killer adoption profile.  Accordingly, I don’t share it with everyone.  In short, I presented a few (6, in particular) bullet points sure to grab the birthparents attention – and – briefly articulating qualities we posses and they would find desirable.

My rationale was that if I positioned their mind to believe that there were a few critical (or highly beneficial) traits (which we portrayed), their mind would be pre-disposed to select us (if the photos validated those claims).  And, my conclusion reinforced the benefits a child would receive by having us as parents.  It also gave me the opportunity to tell them how we are – even if we failed to portray it in the profile.  It’s a winning formula.

Communicate the specific message you want the reader to receive by using a good intro.   If the introduction appeals to the reader, they are very likely to continue reading.  You want the reader to think, “sounds good, now show me”.  End with a good conclusion to let the reader know you validated your claims.  It’s a solid way to present a highly influential presentation.

SIDE NOTE:  We specifically asked our birth mother why she chose us.  She responded with what we strongly believed made us most attractive and unique.   It was no coincidence that we mentioned this quality in the very first sentence after the “Dear Birthparent” letter. 

Use a Computer to Create Your Profile:

Other things being equal, you do not absolutely need to have a digital profile.  Using scrapbook materials, glue, and scissors will do just fine.  However, your profile should/must be perfect – it’s not very likely it will be unless it’s done digitally.

Have a pic you forgot to include?   Shrink down the text here and there, make the other photos smaller.  Insert the pic and you’re done.  Save it as a different file name and if your spouse doesn’t like it (happens to me all the time), you still have the old one.  A digital profile is much more flexible than doing it on paper.  It really helps you make the best of your valuable space and will help it present much better.

There’s one more advantage to digital profiles (I might get beat up over this one).  To be clear, I don’t think birthparents are biased against older adoptive parents.  However, I do think being out of touch with the times is a disadvantage (many birthparents don’t even remember a time before computers).

Today’s generation digs technology – you don’t want to appear to be stuck in the 80’s.  And, please avoid the ClipArt from back then too.  Your profile shouldn’t look like it was done years ago.

“Me and my BFF”, WTH?

In many of the profiles I’ve seen, people try too hard to relate to a younger audience.  Relating to them is a good thing, right?  Absolutely!  However, the fact that you’re “trying” is a turn off.   You don’t want birthparents rolling their eyes and thinking you’re corny.

What’s more, if you’re not really being yourself – the reader can pick up on it.  Create a nice, professional profile – one that portrays you honestly and accurately.  Don’t create one that has been crafted to appeal to a sixteen year old girl (more on this later).

Need help with your profile?  Contact the author at adoptionprofilehelp@yahoo.com.

Adoption STAR does not guarantee the services of third party providers

Stay tuned next Wednesday, February 22, for part four.

Don’t Sell Yourself Short: A Marketer’s Insight To Create a Powerful Adoption Profile

This is the first of a four part blog series on marketing yourself with your adoption profile book. It was written by John Yonkoski who is an adoptive father and marketing professional. Part two will be published Wednesday, February 8.

Understand the goal of your adoption profile; create one that specifically achieves that objective:

To be clear, your adoption profile is your marketing material.  It’s not a scrapbook and it’s not some sort of autobiography with pictures.   A birthparent reviews profiles to find the best home for a child.  You want them to “buy into” the idea that you will provide it.  To do so, you have to sell yourself (just like you would on a resume).  That’s marketing.

I’m surely going to take a lot of heat from those that say that I’m encouraging people to misrepresent themselves in their profile.  That couldn’t be further from the truth.  We have a great relationship with our birth Mom, and I credit that largely to the fact that “what you see (in our profile) is what you get”.

Our adoption profile accurately portrayed who we are.  My knowledge of marketing merely altered the way it was created.  Since we thought of her (rather than ourselves) when we created it – it was presented in a manner that worked for her.  That’s not misleading, it’s marketing.

Your goal is to get the reader to pick up your profile and hold their attention while they learn more about you.   Your objective is to help the reader visualize the type of lifestyle your child will have.   Understand that there will be aspects that may not appeal to some birthparents.  That’s okay.

Although you can’t be “all things to all people”, your profile must make a compelling case when you meet your match.  Like any other marketing piece, a great profile is interesting, informative and influential.

Marketing 101 – people “buy into” benefits, not features

My new car has a “2.5-liter four-cylinder engine that produces 175 horsepower and 180 pound-feet of torque”.  It also has “antilock brakes, stability and traction control, front side airbags and side curtain airbags”.  These are features of my car – I couldn’t possibly care less about them and I’m pretty sure you aren’t impressed.

However, what I do care about is the fact that it’s a decent size car that gets 23 MPG (city), 33 MPG (highway).  I’m also glad to know it earned four stars for frontal impacts and five stars for side impacts.  These are the benefits of the engine and safety features.  That’s what I want.  I want benefits.  Similarly, the birthparents are interested in knowing the benefits of placing a child in your home, not the features of what your home entails.

After all, features are only meaningful to the extent that they produce benefits.  The same goes for you and your profile.  You may have a 3,500 square foot house in a great area.  You might have been married for 20 years and make $250K.   You may spend 3 weeks travelling Europe every year.  But, why do the birthparents care?  Are they supposed to be impressed?  Does it make you special?  Not really – lots of people have great features.  Besides, people don’t “buy into” features anyway – they “buy into” benefits.

The fact that you have plenty of room to play is pretty cool.  I’m sure they’d be happy to know that you live in a safe area.  They’ll think it’s great that you have a stable, equitable, and happy marriage.  They’ll appreciate the opportunities a child would receive and the absence of household pressures provided by your good income.  They’ll think it’s awesome that you spend time traveling with the family.  Those are the benefits a child will receive by being placed in your home.   That’s what they care about.  It’s those benefits you provide that they can “buy into”.

In adoption profiles, it’s very common to see someone make the mistake of discussing their features and assuming the reader will comprehend the benefits.  However, the power of focusing on benefits (rather than features) is absolutely amazing.

Consider this example:

- “Neither of our sisters have children”. (feature of our family)

- “Our child will be very lucky to be the first Grandchild.  Both sets of parents are young, active and healthy – they’re really looking forward to welcoming a little one”. (benefit to our child)

Can you guess which one actually appeared in our profile?   Although both statements are true, they read completely differently.  Whereas some people (myself included) may see the absence of cousins to interact and play with (indicative in the first statement) negatively, I think most would react positively to the latter (since our child gets the full attention of our family).

Don’t make the mistake of focusing on your features.  Instead, focus on what the birthparents are interested in – the benefits.  It’s Marketing 101.

Need help with your profile?  Contact the author at adoptionprofilehelp@yahoo.com.

Adoption STAR does not guarantee the services of third party providers

Stay tuned next Wednesday, February 8, for part two.