Love is a Game that Two Can Play and Both Win

megan montgomery
by Megan Montgomery

“Love is a game that two can play and both win.”
~Eva Gabor (Hungarian-born American socialite and actress)

Surprisingly, the number of US adoptions from Hungary have been few, the most being 11 in 2007. I cannot help but wonder if one of the most unique qualities of the Hungary adoption program actually makes families reconsider Hungary as an option for their adoption journey.
The trip to Hungary to complete an adoption is about 40 days long – yes, 6 weeks. It’s no quick “gotcha day” experience. It more like a “get to know for a long time before I get to officially say you are mine and take you home” experience.

At first this travel time might be shocking and seem impossible. However, I like to think of this time as an extended vacation from your everyday life. Special time carved out to focus on bonding and connecting with one another. Something that in parenting is so critical.

There will be no friends or relatives knocking at your door to finally meet your new child, no one (but you of course) to overwhelm your new son or daughter with gifts, no school to worry about enrolling your child in just yet, no other commitments to take you away from your focus – your new child. What there is, is just time, time for you to get familiar with one another, time to begin learning each others quirks and mannerisms, time to form a bond that will carry you through your life together.This type of time in an environment more familiar to a child, who will eventually lose everything they have ever known, can hopefully help to ease the adjustment into the new home and culture. This type of time where a parent can focus solely on their new addition can hopefully ease their adjustment to parenting a child who has not been with them since birth.

Overall, the design of the Hungarian adoption process seems child- centered and family-oriented. While I know that for many of us it is not easy to take this much time away from our every-day life, but I also know that quality time spent connecting with and getting to know your child in order to start building a lasting foundation for your lifelong relationship, is worth it. Why not do it together submerged in the country and culture that is your child.

Visit here to to learn more about Adoption STAR’s Hungary adoption program.