Adoption Profiles From a Birth Mother’s Point Of View

Recently I spoke with two birth mothers, Aubrey and Erin, about adoption profile books and what made them choose the family that they ended up choosing for their child. Whether you are a potential adoptive family beginning the process of creating your adoption profile, or you’re a birth family beginning to select a family, Aubrey and Erin had some great advice for everyone.

Aubrey and Erin both agreed that the adoption profiles that had a good balance of photos and words were better than the ones that were too wordy, or had too many photos.

“I got four profiles and one of them was mostly pictures, and one was mostly words,” Aubrey said. “The family that I picked was a nice balance of both. That stood out to me.”

When selecting the pictures, make sure that each one serves a purpose. Erin said that her favorite photos showed the families doing activities they enjoyed.

“The family that I chose had some pictures of the home that they live in. They were doing things like cooking or gardening, and I liked that (because) I could picture my daughter living with them,” Erin said. “It made it more real for me and able to feel more comfortable.”

Aubrey also said she looked for pictures that were more candid because it showed off the family’s personalities.

Both women agreed that it’s important to know a potential adoptive families interests. Aubrey said that she wanted to know what the families were all about, and what they liked to do, by the end of each profile.

“It made me feel a lot safer with picking (a family) that I knew their personality,” Aubrey said.

Erin’s advice for birth parents is to remember you are a picking a forever family for your child.

“Pick the family you can picture your child with. Make sure that they have the ideals that you want to share with your child if you kept him or her…if you never went camping traveled and you think that would be a fun childhood and would like your child to experience that part of life, then look for profiles that include that,” Erin said. “If it’s open adoption, also remember that you may have contact (with the family) for the rest of your life. Don’t pick a family that you wouldn’t want to live with.”