Celebrating Mother’s and Birth Mother’s day: Joanne’s Story

This is a big weekend for Adoption STAR as we will be celebrating Birth Mother’s Day on Saturday, as well as Mother’s Day on Sunday. This week on the blog we will be sharing stories from both adoptive and birth mothers about Mother’s Day, Birth Mother’s Day, and their adoption journey.

Today we share the adoption journey of Joanne. Joanne and her husband Hugh adopted their daughter Rhiannon six years ago, and nearly two-and-a-half years later adopted Rhiannon’s biological brother Cameron.

Joanne and Hugh had no idea that Rhiannon’s birth mother was pregnant again until they received a message from Adoption STAR that she had just given birth, and were asked if they would be interested in adopting Rhiannon’s birth brother?

“It was not a tough decision at all to bring home Cameron, we were actually considering adoption (again) at the time because we didn’t want the children to be spaced too far out in age,” Joanne said.

Joanne said that a few days before they adopted Cameron, she was having a conversation with Hugh about a second adoption, and he said to email Adoption STAR to start the process again. Joanne sent the email on Monday morning, and that afternoon received a phone call about Cameron.

Cameron’s birth confirmed dreams that Joanne had been having for months.

“All that winter, I had passed off all these dreams I was having about having a baby boy. Through winter my husband and I had been talking about adoption, so I thought the dreams were from thinking about having another kid,” Joanne said.

On Mother’s Day Joanne said she likes to just relax and be together with the family.

“I can remember growing up and everything was formal, we’d take my mother for brunch or have a big dinner,” Joanne said. “When she went to work we got a lot more casual about things because she was busy. I carried that through about being casual.”

The one tradition that Joanne had with her mother that she’d like to carry-on with her children is going to the farmer’s market to buy flowers to plant in the garden on Mother’s Day. She also spends a lot of time thinking about her children’s birth parents.

“It’s not just about us, it’s about them. If it weren’t for (Rhiannon and Cameron’s birth parents) our family wouldn’t have come to be…I try to have the kids send something to her on Birth Mother’s Day.”

Joanne has always wanted to be a mother but she said that actually becoming a mom is nothing like what she expected.

“I was thinking it would be a lot more quiet and calm. I grew up in a family with a sister eleven years older and a brother seven years younger, so we didn’t have fighting and sibling rivalry because we’re so far different in age,” Joanne said. “I thought it would be children sitting in their pajamas while I read a story, but it’s more like the kids jumping on the bed and me asking ‘do you have any idea what I’m reading about?’”

Joanne has learned to appreciate the noise and the activity in her house, and now couldn’t see her life any other way.

“Now that I have Rhiannon and Cameron and my house is noisy and the kids are running all over, my life would be extremely boring with no kids. I don’t know what I’d do with myself,” Joanne said.

Happy Mother’s Day Joanne!