One adoptive mother shares her frustration with a question that’s pitched to adoptive families all too often.
During an adoption training our agency ran for social workers last week, the participants were asked to complete an exercise that encourages deeper thought (and discussion) about the terminology/language people use when discussing adoption.
All the participants were pretty disturbed by use of the terms “real” parent and “natural” parent. As one participant put it, “The term ‘real parent’ conveys a belief that adoptive parents are not real or somehow less entitled to parent.” Instead of this, participants much preferred the use of the terms birth parent or biological parent, as they felt as though these terms were more accurate descriptions of the relationship between a child and the person who gave birth to them.
Author Jill Robins recently shared her feelings regarding the term “real mom” in a piece she wrote for the website SheKnows. You can find a link to Jill’s article by clicking on the following link: The one adoption question no mom (or kid) should ever have to hear
Kudos to Jill for highlighting the important thought and consideration that needs to go into the words people use when discussing adoption.